Life for myself is a rollercoaster of emotions. One minute I have the next 5 years of my life all planned out in my head and in the next breath, I’m questioning it all. It is really frustrating when you can’t get clear on certain things and often find yourself falling into a depressed state of being.
For me, I think it’s important to dissect each area of my life to see where exactly the problem is coming from: relationships, health, career, finances, etc.
You will usually find there is one area that is key to the constant battle of emotions you have going on – really listen to your intuition when you find what it is that holds you back from being ‘your usual self’. Are you in a relationship that just isn’t making you feel how you once did? Is your diet out of control and having an impact on the rest of your life? Are you at the point of your career where there is no more progression and the future no longer excites you? Or perhaps you are just feeling the strains of living pay check to pay check with no extras to enjoy yourself.
Personally, I find health and relationships play a HUGE factor in my happiness. If I feel there are problems from either of these two it will have a domino effect on the rest of my life and I then become unhappy and unfulfilled. Usually, we have a little voice inside of us that tells us right from the very beginning what the problem is, but we think we know what is best so we override this voice and continue down a path that leads to more confusion and upset. You keep going round and round in circles until you take action on the problem and finally resolve it. Taking action means you must first address the issue. If this means removing yourself from a sticky relationship (not just romantic, this can be friends & family also) that no longer serves you then do so. Often at times, we find ourselves complaining about situations in our life that only we have control over, yet we fail to take the appropriate action to change it. If you are expecting change but not making any changes within your life then you can’t expect to see different results!
Remember life isn’t about always being in a state of elation, you will feel the dark hole pulling you back in that you have fought many times over, nothing seems to be lasting and you find yourself questioning if you are even meant to be happy. Be reassured in the fact that many of us experience this and being in a constant state of elation isn’t a reflection of who you are and how good your life may be. It is normal to feel down, confused and lost – it’s all part of being on this learning journey as a human. Be patient with yourself, be kind with your self-talk and don’t allow these unwanted feelings to stay around longer than they should.
Once you accept sadness as an emotion that pitches up camp temporarily throughout the year instead of defining who you are and letting it take control of your life, you can observe it as it comes and goes; which allows you to detach from the external issues and control your internal self a little better. Sadness is just a visitor within your mental space, not a permanent resident. Listen to it, understand it and master it if you will so you know when to say goodbye.